Motivation rules all of us in everything we do. Think about it. We eat becaue we're hungry, stressed, enjoying a celebration, or any host of reasons. We sleep because we're tired, depressed or sick. We dedicate ourselves to excelling at work, as parents, as students because we want to do well. Motivation is in every tiny part of each day we are blessed to be on this Earth.
However there is a counter to motivation and that is demotivation, and it too surrounds us every single day. We silently fantasize about certain things we want, like a slim body, but we hear voices telling us that we can't do what it takes to achieve that goal. These voices, although coming from inside of us, are a collective of all that we have heard over years of our lives.
Think back to when you were a child--was there anything that you thought you couldn't do? Whether set in reality or acted out fantasies, children believe that they can be and do anything they want. It is during childhood that we are taught about the limits we have. Sure, we can't put on a cape and fly like Superman, but what damaging limits were put on us?
Watch this clip from The Pursuit of Happyness when Will Smith's character catches himself in the act of demotivating his son's dream to play pro basketball:
Maybe you were told that you'd never be strong or pretty enough to find a good mate. Maybe you were always compared to someone else and told that you could never be as good as that person. Maybe the moments of demotivation took on the face of pure criticism. I was a hyper, talkative child long before those sorts of things were diagnosed and medicated, but I was super friendly and outgoing, a gift that could have been put to use if teachers had taken the time to work with it. Up until my mid-20s I had a lot of friends, but also a lot of people who didn't like me specifically because I was so outgoing and happy. Their demotivating words built up over time and I started to withdraw into myself. I stopped joking and smiling for fear that I would chase people away, but what I did was lose myself.
Last year I read "Eat, Pray Love" (which is FAR better than the movie), and during the time the writer was on a spiritual exploration in India, she was told by someone at the ashram that her outgoing, talkative, never-shy character would be perfect for helping new arrivals acclimate to all the new experiences. Up until this moment, she too had seen this part of her as a bad thing, but she took from this experience an honest appreciation for these gifts. After reading this, I have too.
What words have you heard or do you say to yourself that hold you back from what you want out of life? Are they standing in the way of pursuing your dreams? What would happen if you stop listening and start believing in yourself again, like you did when you were 5-years-old? My whole world has opened up in the past few weeks and I'm running toward things I never dreamed of doing (rock climbing, participating in athletic events, traveling solo, white water rafting, running a 5k, and so much more).
This is my life and I'm going to live it the way I want, negative people be damned. You should really do the same.
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