I am realizing that I have a very hard time managing my life. The struggle is between doing the things I want and need to do and having the time to do them.
It dawned on me today that I am falling short in every single one of my endeavors. My weight loss has stalled, I eat healthy MOST of the time, my house is not quite clean, my paper has yet to be completed, doing fun things and visiting friends rarely if ever happens, I get to work late all the time, I'm always struggling to get the last few hours in before a time sheet is due, and I don't even get enough sleep.
A told me a few nights ago that I do too much, and he's right. However, what is the alternative? I cried as I told him that the only things I can cut out are the things that only benefit me (weight loss, healthy eating, schoolwork, visiting friends, etc.), and that I'm tired of denying myself. The alternative would put me right back where I've always been--busting my ass to get everything done and being miserable while I do it. I'm so done with that, but what am I supposed to do?
A third of the way through summer, I've made little progress toward my summer goals. I need to feel something, excited about something. I am bored with everything but work, but even that's not enough to get me out of bed at a decent hour in the morning. I need something, I just don't know what yet.
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